It’s a new week!
I will conquer negative beliefs about myself
Like many people I have trouble letting go of negative thoughts that I have about myself. These negative thoughts often come from outside people whose opinion I value and from whom I seek love and acceptance.
Avoid perfectionism. Often I have trouble accepting anything less than perfection from myself. It puts me off starting tasks, in case I don’t produce perfect results.From now on when I find myself pursuing perfectionism and feeling negatively about it I will take three simple steps. I will stop my current line of thinking, then focus on the effort that will be required to work towards a goal, then steadily apply the required effort.• Changing my focus from a final product (which may be evaluated in terms of “perfection”) to the effort behind a task (which is harder to quantify as “perfect”) can help me appreciate my own good work.
Discard your negative filter.
Sadly I have a habit of focusing only on the negatives in my life. It is a bad habit. Excessive focus on negative or less favorable events in my life can make these events seem disproportionately important.
From now on, when I find my complaining that everything that happens to me is bad, I will try to find a little evidence to the contrary; it is very unlikely that everything is really bad.
Will Never call myself names.
Calling yourself a name is reducing yourself from a human to a single element of yourself that you do not like.
• Saying “I am such a failure” after getting fired from a job is inaccurate and unfair to you. Instead, make the useful comment, “I lost my job, but I can use this experience to find and keep a new job.”
• Saying “I am so stupid” is also likely untrue and reductive. If you feel stupid, it’s more likely that you have a lack of knowledge about something. Instead, think, “I don’t know how to do this basic home maintenance. Perhaps I could take a class and learn to do this in the future.”
I’m so bad for assuming that the worst can happen.
It can be easy to fall into the assumption that the very worst outcome will happen with every situation. I will change my inner thoughts to be realistic or truthful – this will help me avoid the generalization or exaggeration that accompanies assuming the worst.
Rewriting my internal script.
From now on when I realise I’m thinking negatively about myself, I will acknowledge the feeling, identify the source of the feeling, and then consciously make a new statement re-writing my thought as a more positive one.
• For example, if you forgot to send an important work-related email, you may find yourself thinking “I am so stupid! How could I have done that?”• Stop yourself, and think “I feel stupid right now because I forgot to send the email. When I would forget to do things as a child, my father would tell me that I was stupid. These are his words, not my own, in my head.” Then think to yourself, “I am a competent employee who made a human mistake, and I will be sure to write myself a reminder in the future. For now, I will send the email along with an apology for not sending it before.”
I will conquer my mental health. I will not be beaten.
If you would like to chat about mental health issues you have, get in touch, email me. Talking always helps and hopefully I can help you.